Hands off my pants!!!!!!
Apparently in my beloved town there are a couple burglars who are holding people up, robbing them of their cash and valubles and then stealing their pants. Really? Ok So let's go over this a little. Not only do we have criminals who are terrifying people and stealing what they have worked so hard for they then take their pantaloons. Why? I get the procuring of the valuables and the money it's useful to spend to trade to buy goods, and in this case probably drugs, or guns.( just a hunch) but then to take the poor victims pants!
I mean what in are they accomplishing? Do the wood be gangsters believe by doing this they are thereby rendering the burglarees helpless? Because I don't know about you but taking my pants off has never silenced me. In fact there were several occasions when that actually made me more vocal. (wink, wink)
Perhaps these pants pirates have an addiction to pants and were afraid to walk up to people and ask for their pants fearing they would be told no. Maybe these khaki criminals are really donating all of these pants to charity for the otherwise downtrodden and pant less. Whatever the situation I offer this as a solution From now on until such a time when these dastardly dudes are caught we don't carry any valuables or money. I say just carry extra pants!!!! Pants galore!!!!! Jeans, dress pants, capris, khakis, leggings, sweats, if it can cover your legs and your butt then by cracky we carry it! The clothing culprits will be over run with them so that one of two things happen...they one, get so backed up with pants that they turn over a new leaf ( doubtfull) or two, all the police have to do is follow the trail of pants to the perps! Problem solved!!!!!
OK, so maybe it's not that easy and we don't really know what is up with these guys. My guess is in trying to figure out a way to make a name for themselves they had decided that everything had been done. They didn't think that anyone would take them seriously without a quirk to their crime. you know they wanted people to say....watch out for them....they'll steal your pants....or those are the pants bandits They wouldn't be true criminals without this infamous detail! But I will tell you what I say...If the pants fit...wear em!!!!!
( Dear pants bandits,
I am very attached to my pants. Please if you are reading this don't seek me out and attempt to take mine)
I mean what in are they accomplishing? Do the wood be gangsters believe by doing this they are thereby rendering the burglarees helpless? Because I don't know about you but taking my pants off has never silenced me. In fact there were several occasions when that actually made me more vocal. (wink, wink)
Perhaps these pants pirates have an addiction to pants and were afraid to walk up to people and ask for their pants fearing they would be told no. Maybe these khaki criminals are really donating all of these pants to charity for the otherwise downtrodden and pant less. Whatever the situation I offer this as a solution From now on until such a time when these dastardly dudes are caught we don't carry any valuables or money. I say just carry extra pants!!!! Pants galore!!!!! Jeans, dress pants, capris, khakis, leggings, sweats, if it can cover your legs and your butt then by cracky we carry it! The clothing culprits will be over run with them so that one of two things happen...they one, get so backed up with pants that they turn over a new leaf ( doubtfull) or two, all the police have to do is follow the trail of pants to the perps! Problem solved!!!!!
OK, so maybe it's not that easy and we don't really know what is up with these guys. My guess is in trying to figure out a way to make a name for themselves they had decided that everything had been done. They didn't think that anyone would take them seriously without a quirk to their crime. you know they wanted people to say....watch out for them....they'll steal your pants....or those are the pants bandits They wouldn't be true criminals without this infamous detail! But I will tell you what I say...If the pants fit...wear em!!!!!
( Dear pants bandits,
I am very attached to my pants. Please if you are reading this don't seek me out and attempt to take mine)
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